Title: Dealing
Author: by Princess CC
Email: PrincessCCDoyle@cs.com



Doyle walked through the office toward Cordelia. Cordelia smiled and

walked toward him and touched his face lightly. Then, in a flash of light,

he was gone....

"Doyle!!" Cordelia jerked up quickly from where she was sleeping on

Angel's bed. She shook uncontrollably, her body damp with sweat.

Angel rushed into the room and sat on the bed, pulling her into his arms.

"Shh...Cordy. it's all right..."

Cordy rocked back and forth in his arms, crying softly. "I saw him,

touched him...Doyle was here, Angel..."

Angel pushed a strand of damp hair out of her eyes. "Doyle's gone,

Cordy...he's gone."

`Cordy buried her face in his arm and sobbed quietly. Angel glanced

toward the doorway to where Buffy and Xander were now standing, watching

the scene with sadness. He nodded at them as if to let them know it was 

all right and they turned and walked out into his living room.

Angel looked back down at the brunette in his arms and sighed in relief

as he noticed her sobs had subsided.

"Sleep Cordy. You need your rest..." He settled her onto the bed and

kissed her lightly on the forehead. He walked to the door and gave one last

glance at her now-sleeping form before walking out into the living room.





Xander jumped up from his seat in the living room as he saw Angel walk in.

"How is she?"

Angel sighed and leaned against the bookcase. "She's sleeping. She's OK,

for now..."

Buffy walked over and touched Angel lightly on the arm. "I'm glad you

called us. We didn't know Doyle but we know how much he meant to you and

Cordy."

Angel shied away from her touch and nodded. "I thought you could help

Cordelia. She's taking it pretty hard."

Buffy looked at him, trying to read his thoughts through his dark eyes.

"What about you? How are you taking it?"

They all glanced toward the door as they heard Cordelia cry out from

inside. Angel started toward the door but Xander stopped him.

"Let me go...I want to help." Angel nodded and Xander walked inside. He

sat gently on the edge of the bed and spoke softly. "Cordy?"

Cordy shivered. "He's gone...he's gone..."

Xander took her hand in his and rubbed the back of it with his thumb.

"It's gonna be OK, Cor. Everything will be fine..."

Cordelia looked up at his face, finally acknowledging who was with her.

"Xander? Hold me..."

Xander sat back against the headboard and held her as she cried.





Angel sat down on the couch and leaned forward, resting his face in his

hands. Buffy walked over a put her hand on his shoulder. This time he

didn't shy away from her touch. "Angel?"

Angel looked up at her, resting his hands in his lap. His eyes glazed

over with unshed tears. "It should've been me...I should've stopped it, not

Doyle!" He shouldn't have died!"

Buffy sat next to him and laid her hand comfortingly on his thigh. "It

wasn't your fault, Angel. Doyle had to do it...if he hadn't you and

Cordelia, not to mention like twenty others would have died."

Angel shook his head. "But I should have saved them."

Buffy took his hand in hers. "If you had been the one to die then all of

the innocent people you help every day would die! Doyle knew that and did

what he knew he had to do...let you live!"

Angel sighed and stood up, pulling his hand from Buffy's. "I'm going to

go check on Cordelia." He walked into his bedroom quietly, Buffy following

close behind.

Xander glanced up at Angel and Buffy as they walked into the room. He

raised a finger to his lips and looked back down to Cordy, sleeping in his

arms. They walked over to the bed and Angel reached down to stroke her

cheek lightly.

"How long has she been asleep?"

Xander carefully shifted out from under her and settled her onto the

pillows then stood up. "About ten minutes. She finally cried herself to

sleep..."

Buffy nodded and pulled a blanket up over Cordy. "Angel, Xander and I are

going to go back to the hotel..." Xander started to protest but she shot

him a look that silenced him. "You get some sleep OK, Angel?"

Angel nodded and Buffy gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. She and Xander

then turned and walked out. Angel sighed and brushed Cordy's hair out of

her face. "We'll be OK, Cordy...I promise." Angel turned and walked out into

the living room to sleep on the couch.

A smile appeared on Cordelia's face as she heard a voice speak to her.

"Everything will be fine, Princess..." And she drifted into a deeper sleep.





Cordelia pulled back the blanket and swung her legs off the bed. She slowly

got up and pulled one of Angel's sweatshirts over her head. Wrapping her

arms tightly around herself, she walked out into the living room quietly and

went upstairs to the office.

Angel stirred on the couch in the living room at the slight noise of the

elevator but did not awaken.

Cordelia walked over to the couch and curled up in one corner of it. She

took the remote into her hand and pressed play. She hugged a pillow to her

chest as she watched Doyle's attempt at the 'Angel Investigations"

commercial. Tears spilled over onto her cheeks as Doyle's rich, Irish

accent flowed over the words. She paused it on the last frame and stared at 

the image on the screen. The image blurred as yet more tears filled her eyes.

Angel rubbed his hand over his eyes and sat up. He walked into the

bedroom and stopped dead in his track as he saw the empty bed. He rushed to

the bathroom and then the kitchen, worriedly. "Cordy? Where are you?" Angel

stepped into the elevator and quickly closed the doors, waiting impatiently

as the elevator rose to the main floor. He rushed out the moment it stopped

and spotted Cordelia curled up on the couch staring blankly at the

television, silent tears streaming down her face. Angel rushed to her and

knelt on the floor beside her. "Cordy?" He glanced over at the television

and saw Doyle's face staring back at him. "Oh God Cor...why are you doing this

to yourself?" He looked back at Cordelia and realized she still hadn't noticed

he was there. "Cordelia?" Still nothing...not even a glance in his

direction.

Angel thought for a moment. "Princess?" He called her by Doyle's pet name

for her. She finally looked at Angel for a moment but immediately returned 

her attention toward the television and the image of their hero.





Angel glanced toward Cordelia and continued pacing the floor. He stuffed

his hands into his pockets and looked toward the door as he heard it swing

open. Buffy and Xander walked in and glanced around. Buffy rushed over to

Angel as Xander rushed to Cordy's side.

Xander touched her hand and got no reaction. He looked toward Angel.

"what happened?"

Angel gritted his teeth together. "The man she was falling in love with

died."

Buffy touched his arm soothingly and Xander glanced back at Cordy. "I

meant why is she so distant?"

Angel relaxed a bit and walked over to them. "I don't know...I found her

like this when I woke up."

Xander looked at him angrily. "And you didn't do anything? How could you

let her stay like this?"

Angel growled quietly and balled his fists tightly. Buffy stepped between

them. "Xander...it's not Angel's fault. There's nothing he can do..." She

turned to Angel and put her hand lightly on his chest. "Angel, why don't

you go downstairs and get something to eat?" Angel gave Xander another angry

look but turned and went downstairs. Buffy turned back to Xander. "It's not 

his fault, Xander..."

Xander nodded. "I know..."

Buffy touched his shoulder lightly. 'I'm going to go down and make sure

angel is OK. Stay here with Cordy. Make sure she doesn't go anywhere..."

Xander sighed. "I don't think she's going anywhere..."

Buffy nodded. "She'll get through this, Xander. She has to..." She turned

and went to the elevator and watched Xander and Cordelia until the elevator

lowered.

Xander looked away from Buffy and sat beside Cordelia. He touched her

cheek lightly. "Cor? It's me...Xander. Can you hear me?" Xander sighed.

"Cordy, do you remember the day you left for LA?" Xander continued on, not

bothering to wait for a reply. "Well, that day I went to your apartment and

watched from across the street as you drove away. I stood there for hours

after you left, just staring after you, imagining what it would have been

like if you had taken me with you...but finally, I came out of it and

glanced around and noticed it had gotten dark a long time ago...that's 

when I realized you were gone from my life and it hurt..." Xander hooked

his finger under her chin and turned her face toward his. "Is that what

you're feeling, Cordy? Lost? Just like I felt when I realized you were 

gone?"

Cordelia focused on his face somewhat and slowly reached her hand up to

his face. "Xander?" She suddenly slammed against the couch, her hand tight

on her forehead. She stared straight ahead, jerking slightly.

Xander looked at her, terrified, and grabbed her arm. "Cordy! What's

wrong? What's going on?"

Cordy stopped moving for a moment and looked up at Xander, speaking

quietly.

"Get Angel..."





Buffy took the mug of warm blood from the microwave and set it on the

table in front of Angel. He looked up and forced a smile, wrapping his

hands around the mug. Buffy sat in the chair across from him and waited for

him to say something. When he didn't, she spoke up. "Angel, tell me about 

him..."

Angel sighed and pushed the full mug away from him. "Doyle? He was a good

guy I guess...a drunk one at that...never wanting to come to terms with the

fact that he was part demon and that he had visions of the future. He was

hung up on Cordelia but could never get up the nerve to tell her..." He ran

his hand through his hair then slammed it on the table, angrily. "Who am I

kidding? Doyle was a great friend and a better man then I could ever be!"

He sacrificed his life so I wouldn't sacrifice my own! I don't deserve that

much!"

Buffy reached across the table and took his hand into hers. "Obviously

Doyle thought you deserved to live. Otherwise, you wouldn't be sitting here

right now...and then..." Buffy looked down at the table and spoke quietly.

"...I would be the one grieving over losing the man I love..."

Angel leaned across the table and lifted her chin with his other hand

then, brushed his lips lightly across hers. "Thank you..."

Buffy looked at him questionably. "For what?"

Angel touched her cheek softly. "For being here for me...for loving me..."

Buffy smiled. "Always..."